What is Yours? May 9, 2014 ~ Lisa Helm “He is the long-delayed but always expected something that we live for.” Tennessee Williams “The Glass Menagerie” What is YOUR “long delayed but always expected”? Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:Like Loading...
3 thoughts on “What is Yours?”
My long delay is my graduation year. As a child, I always wanted to grow up and be treated like an adult. But now that I am finally growing up and soon to be eighteen, I realize how much I miss being a little kid. When I was a little girl I didn’t worry about what I looked like, how high my grades were or what others thought about me. My future is here now though and I must embrace it.
Even though I am terrified of the future, having to one day move out, get a real job, and be independent, this is something that I have looked forward to for as long as I can remember. Those who have graduated before me and those I see graduating very soon, seem to have so much fun and have always made exciting memories. Everyone always tells me that you should have the time of your life in grade 12; don’t waste a moment of your last year of high school because you will never have this opportunity again. I can’t wait to join in all the fun grad activities, buy a grad dress and go on a grad trip with all my friends.
I know that my last year of high school will be an extremely stressful year for me, with all the diploma exams, having to decide what I want to do in the future and truly growing up into a responsible adult. However, in the end it will all be worthwhile, as I move forward into the next exciting phase of my life and my long delay finally arrives.
My long-delayed but always expected would have to be my future. In this last year of school I’ve began to think non stop about what my life will be like as I grow older. When you’re younger it’s the idea of becoming 16. The big sweet sixteen when you can drive and have all the freedom in the world. I remember being at elementary school wanting nothing more the big girls that strut up and down the halls. Id dream of what I would look like and what kind of person I would become. Once I got to grade 9 and entered the ever terrifying high school my fixation transferred to the grade 12 girls, the ones who dressed like something out of a magazine. I was so envious of their confidence and how they looked so sure of themselves. Now that I’ve hit eleventh grade and I see close friends graduating and leaving the comfort within the four walls of St. Joe’s I fear for what lies beyond them. At least once a day I think about my goal of pursuing a career in nursing. College is a scary thought and I can’t help but wonder if I will be able to get through it. Then I go on to thinking about achieving my goals in education to actually using these learned traits in the real world. I’m constantly wondering if I will be good enough and if people will take me seriously. After all of the worries about my career fade away the idea of family lingers on. I’ve always wanted the perfect little family that you hope is a reality and not just some fantasy that you fabricated in your head. A boy and a girl, not too far apart in age so that they are able to keep each other company. Supporting this dream might be what scares me the most. I know nothing of the adult world. Taxes and budgeting are all a mystery to me. All of these pieces of my future combine to form one big headache that I can’t get rid of. All I want for myself is to succeed, yet the fear of failure is persist in the fact that it never leaves me alone. My long-delayed but always expected is not on my future, but all of the obstacles that lie in my way of reaching my desired outcome.
Since I was young I dreamed of becoming a professional sports star. The sport was undecided although I knew I wanted to peruse the things I loved for the eternity of my life. It wasn’t for the money or the fame for that matter, it was the atmosphere. The sudden shortness of breath as you enter the stadium, blood beating heavily as the puck is dropped or the first pitch grazes the strike zone. Pursuing a common goal with a team, which is like your second family. Although my long delay but always expected soon became unexpected. It hit me like a gust of wind in a southern storm. Devastated I realized it takes more than a dream to make reality and with every choice comes opportunity. Therefore with every closed door a new one opens. So the quest began again, and with long hours of searching my vocation became clear; a sports therapist and dietitian. This path is practical but also holds bits and pieces of my fantasy. Ultimately I have come to the conclusion that the dreams we have shed are like relatives to our long delayed but always expected. Dreams are something that we long for and somewhere deep in our hearts are always expected. We all know life isn’t perfect therefore with dreams come compromise. You never know, compromise may be the key to unlock your long delayed but always expected.